Saturday, July 16, 2011

New Beginning



Creativity is hard right now. I feel the black hole pulling at me... and then I opened an email yesterday with this poem. There is no way my own words could have captured so precisely and exquisitely where I am right now. I do know there is big change on the horizon. Maybe dancing with the darkness again is part of the shift.  For me, it's a weird poem in that I can't seem to find its rhythm. Perhaps that's by design... so that its beat does not take away from its words, which frankly, turn me inside out and completely undo me.

For a New Beginning
by John O'Donohue

In out-of-the-way places of the heart,
Where your thoughts never think to wander,
This beginning has been quietly forming,
Waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire,
Feeling your emptiness growing inside you,
Noticing how you willed yourself on,
Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety
And the gray promises that sameness whispered,
Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,
Wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled,
And out you stepped onto new ground,
Your eyes young again with energy and dream,
A path of plentitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not yet clear
You can trust the promise of this opening;
Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning
That is at one with your life's desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure;
Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;
Soon you will be home in a new rhythm,
For your soul senses the world that awaits you.

I love even just the last lines together:

Waiting until you were ready to emerge
Still unable to leave what you had outgrown
Wondered would you always live like this
A path of plentitude opening before you
That is at one with your life's desire
For your soul senses the world that awaits you.

The line that grieves me the most is about still being unable to leave what you had outgrown. What I have outgrown. There is so much sadness and loss in those words I can't even begin to write about them. Not right now anyway. I know that once again I sit at the crossroads of security and growth. Dancing. Waiting. For what my soul senses is the world that awaits. 

2 comments:

  1. Hi Debby

    It's 1.43 am in the morning when I am visiting your blog. I will read the poem later, because I want to be able to concentrate on the text, but wanted to say that I love the 'image' you are using to illustrate it. Because of the symbolism and above all because of the artistic point of view. That's why image isn't the right word at all. I wonder how you create pieces of art like these, 'cause to me, that's what they are. Really really love and adore them. I will be back very soon :-)

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  2. first off let me tell you that I always feel as though I've been kissed by an angel when you pay me a visit at my blog. it's just so special. I knew you had a new post up but haven't been able until now to take the time I know I need in order to savor it. what a gift you were given with this poem. I'm not familiar with the poet but intend to look further. I'm familiar with the pull of that old black hole, in fact I've even used that term in reference to the feeling. it can be a constant struggle to keep it at bay, sometimes we win, other times not so much. but the true test is "are you gaining any ground?" it may seem like only an inch, a very small step, but that's everything. your photo is like a painting. it's the first step. take good care Debby. always a pleasure.

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There seems to be a problem with posting comments. I'm trying to figure it out. I so appreciate you wanting to comment, and please, feel free to email me anytime at debby.aloha@gmail.com